Patience

All I want for Christmas is patience!
I have none.
People irritate the hell out of me. The way they walk. The way they talk. The way they post on the internet. The way they drive. How is it that I have next to zero tolerance for my fellow man? What's worse, I'm only 25. What the hell will I be like when I'm 75?? Lord have mercy on us all!
I'm anxious to get my flight booked for New Years. I'm so set on going home that I think even if we don't book a flight I'll plan on driving up. I don't necessarily look forward to driving in snowy weather - especially since I haven't done it in almost 5 winters. But I really feel that if I don't make the trip then this talk between me and Chad will remain just that - talk. Not that I don't believe him when he says he wants to come here, but he hasn't seen me in 4 years... he needs all the motivation I can give him to take the plunge.
He called me on Sunday. It's the first time he's ever called on a weekend. Normally he has the girls and so he can't call - or he's busy working in his dad's shop. This weekend he got called in to work at the factory on Saturday and Sunday. I take it after 3 days of not hearing my voice or reading my emails he was ready for some contact. My mom and I had talked about his family over the weekend. She grew up with his parents and his uncle. They are sweet people and she doesn't understand why he would want to move away from them. She doesn't think it'll happen.
I told him as much. He says she just doesn't know the situation. I asked him if he's said anything to his parents yet. He says he doesn't discuss that kind of thing with them. Maybe I talk to my parents TOO much? He thinks I do.
So, since he didn't work on the snowmobiles like planned he doesn't have the extra cash coming in. But pulling in the overtime at the factory might still be enough. I've found a round trip flight for $217 - which is pretty good considering the time of year - but we have to jump on it before it gets too close to the holidays.
If we don't book then I'll plan on driving. And just to be difficult I'll stay with my grandparents - that'll show him I'm not messing around. Driving will require an extra day off work - but I'm sure that will be ok. I'll just make sure the runner is trained really well in my position.
Enough thinking about that. I need to wrap up the UPS package before they show up.

Time Sure Flies

I can't believe that Thanksgiving is Thursday! Where in the hell has this year gone? Regardless, it's definitely been one of my more eventful years. Between the meet and greet with Kenny Chesney, buying my house, work progressing like it has, relationships progressing like they have... man, I need a year off to recover from this one!
This weekend was a nightmare if I've ever lived one. I'll spare the details to protect the innocent (unfortunately, I'm not one of the innocent this time) but let's just say - it won't be happening again.
On a happier note, I believe Chad is telling his family about the move this week. Probably at Thanksgiving, which isn't necessarily the BEST place to do it, but as long as it gets done I'm happy. All I know is that when I asked him last week if we were booking the flight, he told me that he would know at the end of this week. God help me if our plans get shot all to hell.
There's more I suppose I could ramble about, but why waste the precious internet space?

I Feel the Need

I am so overcome with a need to write. A lot has happened in the last month, I'm not sure where to even start.
"He" has taken the ending of our "relationship" rather well. He hasn't pressed where he shouldn't and he's given me the space I've requested. What's better - I'm not missing him like I thought I might. I guess I knew in my heart that when things got started between us for the second time, they weren't going to be any better than they were the first time. I was just hopeful that we would work - because I did care.
But when life closes a door it always opens a window. That's where Chad fits in. So crazy how fate can bring people into your life just when you need them most. It's even more insane considering my past with Chad. I'm still waiting for him hit me with the punch line - confess that our talk is all a big joke on me. But then, why would a GUY invest time, energy, and money into a relationship (or potential relationship) if he's not getting any in the process?
By the way things are looking he should be moving down here around the first of the year. If for some reason it doesn't work that way, he's flying me home for New Years. That's a $300 plane trip. $300 for a bootie call? I don't think so.
That's why I'm convinced that this thing with us is going to work. He wants it as much as I do. And NEVER have I been involved with a guy that wanted the same thing in our relationship that I did. The other convincing factor - he cares and is concerned for me. He calls to ask how my day is going. He expresses an interest in my life and what's going on. He hounds me about doing too much for the guys at work and how that can lead to them taking advantage of me. No one has ever expressed this kind of concern for my being.
Aww. But he is a man. And he does tend to think with one head more than the other. And he likes to tease and flirt and get me riled. He'll call and say things to me, while I'm at work, that gets my face all red. He'll email and tell me all the things he intends to do once we get to finally be together. So, not only is he caring and protective of me - he's turned on by me. And even though he can be somewhat trashy in talk - it's not the slimey kind of dirty talk that the guys have done in the past. It's hard to explain.
Regardless, Chad is my ray of light. His emails and calls brighten my day. And even though other guys have had that effect on me - none of them managed to do it so effortlessly and powerfully as he does. So that has to mean something, right?